Photo by Warren Wong on Unsplash
10:48 P.M.
He gurgles the large pool of water and spits it into the sink. A minute later, he lathers his face with soap and carefully gives himself a clean shave. When done, he brushes his hair, puts on a firmly iron pressed shirt and pants, checking himself in the mirror one last time before finally content with the results. He’s ready.
Moments later, he grabs his coat, car keys and rushes out the door. He was not going to be late. Normally, he would take his time leaving his apartment to go to work. Not tonight. Tonight was not a normal occasion. Tonight was something more and it had to be perfect. She is waiting. Her... his love.
He gets into his car and takes a deep breath. He hasn’t even started the engine and already his heart is pounding, and for good reason. After twenty-three years of secrecy, he is finally going to tell her how he feels. He can see those years flash before him. Years that he has cherished for so long.
Tonight was the payoff.
Silencio
Silencio is a complicated man. His real name is Angel del Toro, but he goes by Silencio. We’ll get to that in a bit.
He grew up an orphan in the south oak cliff area of Dallas, TX. His upbringing wasn’t the best. Most of his memories are of the abuse he endured from his foster parents, whether it was a beating from his foster father, or belittling from his foster mother, but he had grown used to the mistreatment. If anything, it helped him grow thick skin, but psychologically, not so much. Silencio was born in the Christina Melton Crain Unit Prison. His biological mother was serving time for stabbing her late boyfriend to death on account that:
“He used me as his punching bag every chance he got until I finally had enough. He wasn’t gonna hurt me anymore.”
Silencio was given to the state and then to the foster care system after his mother refused to keep him.
Growing up, Silencio had trouble in school and was often the oddball in class. He was the target of bullies, and though he did inherit an attractive look, girls still found him creepy. He kept to himself and hardly said a word. His quiet, introvert, and gullible personality made him popular among his peers. and for all the wrong reasons. With the combination of his shy personality and Latino background, they called him, (you guessed it), SILENCIO, meaning Silent in Spanish.
Silencio loved mystery. And by mystery, I don’t mean stories of fiction. No, no. Silencio loved the mystery of people. His curiosity of the human body and the psychology of behaviors fascinated him, more so than anything else. Why were some people bigger than others? Did their bodies work different? He wanted to learn their preferences, their dialogue. Their lives was what interested him the most. He often sat staring at people for minutes at a time, imagining their life play out before him. Of course, this almost always results in misinterpreted meaning from others and he was met with anger and disgust, but Silencio meant no harm. Even after an altercation, Silencio didn’t react violently. He took whatever beating, or harassment that came, then, simply walked away as if nothing had happened.
That was life for Silencio. Wake up, school, bullies, go home, abuse, sleep, repeat. But on a chilly and cloudy afternoon, everything changed.
The Silent Book Club
Silencio’s toughness against bullies gained the respect of a few classmates, who related very well to him. In December one afternoon, Silencio found himself surrounded by a small, but solid group of friends: Jacob, David, and Tracy, otherwise known as The Silent Book Club.
The SBC wasn’t your traditional book club. Traditional book clubs assigned readings and members would meet and discuss the book with each other. The problem with Silencio’s high school book club is that members were mainly kids who wanted an excuse to get out of class for half an hour to gossip on the latest school drama. The Silent Book Club was different. First off, every member actually loved reading. There also were no assigned books and no one was forced to talk about it either. If they felt like sharing what they read, great, but it wasn’t required. Why? Because members of the SBC were introverts. They, like Silencio, kept to themselves and tried their best to ignore large social gatherings. Jacob, David, and Tracy would meet afterschool to literally read in silence. Hence, The Silent Book Club.
Initially, Silencio didn’t know much how to react to the new found attention. He never had friends before. So he did what he always did, kept silent. The SBC didn’t mind though. They welcomed him into the club without judgement. The SBC were a tight group and they supported each other beyond their love for reading. It was the company Silencio sorely needed, a complete opposite from his normal environment. And while Silencio wasn’t really a book reader, he appreciated the safety and comfort the club provided.
One afternoon, while at the public library, the SBC were out hunting for the their next feed. Each member had their own taste in books. Tracy was a fanatic of fantasy fiction and no author carried more credit to her than Raymond Feist. Since first reading his book, Magician, the Riftwar Universe had become her escape, engulfed her in a world full of magic and sorcery. Jacob is very much into crime fiction. His first taste of it was Jan Burke’s Bones and has been on an Irene Kelly series binge ever since. Bones reminded him a little bit of Silence of the Lambs, his favorite movie. David is the YA reader with a fond for drama. His love for this genre began ever since his reading class was assigned the book, Swallowing Stones by Joyce McDonald. No other book since has topped it. He often rants about Hollywood ignoring good original stories for the cliché mainstream appeal and how much money they would make if they just invested in YA book adaption.
While the group were off in their own sections, Silencio found himself staring at a book on display. There was something intriguing about it that he couldn’t take his eyes off. The cover showed a gloved hand grasping a scalpel. The title read, Working Stiff: Two Years, 262 Bodies, and the Making of a Medical Examiner by Judy Melinek and TJ Mitchell. Silencio reached for the book and read the summary. When he finished, a warm feeling of excitement filled him inside, and he couldn’t help but smile.
When the group met at the checkout counter, Silencio was the first in line. The book Silencio held in his hands would have a major influence in his life, and whether he knew it or not, would come to define him.
11:22 P.M.
The wait had been painful. Several times he thought of giving up, but he just couldn't let her go. One would think him to be creepy, a stalker even, and maybe they're right. He watched her grow since middle school. He was there when she lost her virginity, when she got married, when she gave birth to her twins.
He was there through it all, but don't get him confused for those crazy stalkers. He would never have hurt her, or her family. He loved her too much to ruin what she had, even if she did marry John, a guy he thought wasn't worthy of her love.
He never liked John. John was two-faced and bipolar. He's witnessed them argue time and time again. There were even nights when he's wanted to call in an anonymous tip to 911 whenever John became physically violent. John was bad for her, but he was her choice, and he respected her decision.
He pulls out his badge, presses it against the scanner, and enters the hospital building. He makes his way to his floor. It seemed empty. The entire floor is dark. The only light visible is at the other end of the hall. He reaches the room and opens the door.
As he walks inside the cold chamber, he feels a sense of relief. The comfort of his office makes tonight seem less stressful. This was his second home. In here, nothing could bother him, not even the refrigerators lining the back wall. A single spotlight puts focus on the gurney anchored in the center of the room. He walks up to it and swallows hard.
There she is, blanket draped over her, sleeping. He knows its her by her toes. He always thought she had cute feet. The tag around her big toe confirms her identity, Megan.
He reaches out to touch her, but pulls back.
"I thought that when I finally had you alone I'd know what to say, but now I can't seem to find my words."
He takes a deep breath and exhales slowly.
“I love you”
"I've always loved you. That day by the bridge thirty years ago, it wasn't an accident that you stopped me from jumping. I was in a bad place back then. And you... you saved me from my own destruction. You brought me peace. I owe my life to you."
He stares at the blanket a long while. Tears well up in his eyes.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I should've been there, like you were there for me. I should've been, but I wasn't."
He turns away and breaks down. He had never felt this much pain before. To him, losing her was like dying himself.
He gathers himself and turns back to face the gurney.
"I want you to know that your kids will be safe. No harm will come to them. I promise. I won't fail this time."
He pulls the blanket to reveal her face. Upon seeing her, he turns away slightly and holds back his emotions. He looks at her again. Her eyes stay fixated on the ceiling, all signs of life gone. Her pale skin shines a soft blue as the light above highlights her face.
He studies her face. To this day, he can't figure out why she did it. The report states it was suicide, drug overdose. The drug found near her was Citalopram.
"Citalopram? Why would you have Citalopram in your system?"
He thought a moment. Something didn't feel right. Citalopram is a serotonin drug, used to treat mental illness, something Megan was not.
Then it hit him.
"This wasn't suicide..."
Those drugs did not belong to Megan, and she did not suffer from mental illness. But he knew who did... John.